


Jaspar Sucks At Cooking

by Fluffysminion



Series: Lost in a Dream of Mirrors [3]
Category: Warhammer 40.000
Genre: Mutation Stage: One, Penumbra (demon world), The Tall and the Smalls
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-13
Updated: 2020-04-13
Packaged: 2021-03-01 16:53:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,116
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23630383
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fluffysminion/pseuds/Fluffysminion
Summary: It is hard to teach someone to cook when they don't know what cooking is and can't taste anything.
Series: Lost in a Dream of Mirrors [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1844359
Comments: 4
Kudos: 1





	Jaspar Sucks At Cooking

“This should be easy right?” Jaspar looked to Karger for reassurance as he put the thing they’d caught on the counter. It was upsettingly large and fly-like, and the thought of touching it, let alone eating it, made him feel ill.

“Y’c’rect lud, t’jus needs heating a little, then t’ll b’safe t’eat.”

“So it’s not safe now? I thought it was just not edible.” Great. So the consequences for messing this up were worse than just not having any food. The thought made Jaspar turn even paler than usual. “In what way is it dangerous?”

“Well y’can eat t’raw, but y’might g’t worms or sumin.” The way Karger said it made it clear he thought this was obvious, but also not a big deal.

Jaspar grimaced. “Is that what it sounds like? Actually no, don’t tell me. I don’t want to know.” He looked again at the bug in front of him. At least it wasn’t moving anymore; he hated the way they moved.

The fly crunched under the knife, Nikota winced as shards of exoskeleton were distributed though the flesh. Jaspar glanced over at Karger, but the man was still watching out the glass wall, taking perhaps too much care to avoid looking in his direction. Jaspar eventually managed to get most of the shards out, but along with the mess he made of scraping the meat from the inside he reckoned he’d managed to get about a third less than Karger and Nikota normally managed. Which considering it was barely enough to feed two people, was far from ideal.

“Either of you two able to salvage any of this?” He gestured to the pile of bug parts he’d given up finding any more edible bits in. Nikota took Karger’s position watching the street allowing him to step in. Karger manged to get a bit more meat from it, he avoided eye contact with Jaspar but everything from his posture to the careful way he examined each piece expressed irritation.

“I’m sorry, I made quite a mess of it. I think I started to get the hang of it towards the end though?”

“T’s n’t bad lud. Not bad.” Karger stepped back to his watch position in the doorway, leaving Jaspar to wonder what had happened to him to make him so awkward and fearful around strangers.

Jaspar smiled as he transferred the meat to the pot over the fire, relieved to not have got anything seriously wrong so far. The water was beginning to bubble and give off steam, something he associated with engines not food. But with Nikota checking on his progress and Karger able to step in if required he felt confident despite having no clue what he was doing.

He wasn’t entirely certain what swirling the water around was achieving, but Nikota seemed to think it was important, and it was easy to do while talking. He got to tell her about the monthly ceremony of welcoming for the train that brought food from the factories, and how guarding it was a role usually given to recruits – being one of those tasks that seemed prestigious and important but was in reality incredibly tedious. Yes all the most important people of the district were there, but the ceremony was almost entirely in binary and lasted most of the day, and the guards had to stand entirely still for most of it.

It took him a while to notice that Nikota was only nodding along and looking concerned at the steaming pan. He’d probably meant to have stopped cooking it a while ago. Which wasn’t too bad he supposed, at least it meant it was definitely safe. It still didn’t look much like food, but it did look a lot less like bits of dead animal in water.

Jaspar scraped it from the pot and split it into portions, there wasn’t much, and he felt guilty that if he hadn’t insisted on trying to cook there definitely would have been more. But he was quite pleased with himself for having produced something that looked somewhat like what he would have expected Karger to prepare, with only minimal supervision from Nikota.

Karger was still watching the street for any sign of the featureless dancers that they’d gone into the house to avoid. Jaspar coughed to get his attention and handed him his share, Karger took it cautiously, checking repeatedly that Jaspar wasn’t objecting to him taking it. Despite the unquantifiable length of time they’d been travelling together they were still very uncomfortable around each other, but Jaspar was hopeful that being able to help with more of the things Karger did would make things less awkward.

Jaspar tried to hide the disgust on his face as he started his own food, it tasted horrible, same as everything else. Ash, ash and more ash, it made him feel sick but there wasn’t any way to avoid it. There wasn’t any food that didn’t taste of it.

He looked up and saw Nikota and Karger regarding their food with as much disgust as he felt about his. “Did I do something wrong?”

“No lud, t’s fine.” Karger looked nervously at Nikota but it was too late, she had already started talking.

“Did y’taste this’t any point?” She seemed confused rather than annoyed. “Why didn’t y’ask f’r help wh’n t’started t’burn?”

Jaspar ran his hands through his hair, uncomfortable with explaining his failures to a child. “I, er, didn’t know that was what was happening.” It took a moment for him to get past his embarrassment to process what she had said. “Wait, burnt? But it was underwater, and I didn’t see any fire. How’d that happen?”

“I dunno how to explain lud, fud burns if it’s hot f’too long.” Karger was apologetic, and was trying to be gentle. Nikota however still had questions and was far more bold.

“But didn’t y’notice it going black? An’ tasting burnt?” She seemed genuinely curious, just oblivious to how mortified both Karger and Jaspar were by her quesioning.

“Things change colour when you cook them, and meat goes darker, I remember that much! I just wanted to make sure it was cooked and safe, so it didn’t give us maggots or whatever. And uh…” Jaspar swallowed. “I can’t taste. Anything.”

“’m sorry lud.” Karger’s looks of disapproval had finally got through to Nikota, who didn’t have anything to add this time.

Jaspar forced a smile, the awkwardness worse than the interrogation. “I’m sorry too. I hope this makes up for it?” He dug into his bag and got out three ration bars – a type of food he did understand. “I think I’ll stick to being a lookout from now on.”


End file.
